I have a new mantra, internal saying, what ever you want to call it. When I go to make a decision, I ask my self, what would you usually do in this case? And then, I do the exact opposite.
One thing I have finally learned is that I have been on a slow downward spiral for many years. I've been floating through life from one catastrophe to another. It hasn't been life, it's been survival. It's been a coping mechanism I learned at a very young age. It helped me to make it through a very chaotic childhood.
I learned very young to never form attachments to things or people. Or places. I learned very early that making friends was futile since I would just be moving soon. I withdrew into myself a long long time ago, shut the door, lost the key.
Food has been my friend for a very long time. I am rapidly becoming more aware of the relationship I have with food. The reason I over eat. Self awareness is the first step.
