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| reality check |
Oh my god. I look at this picture and I suddenly find myself wanting to cry. I look at it and see failure. I see years of abusing my body, years of no self control. What I see angers me, disgusts me and makes me feel so many other things I can't even describe in words.
It's a huge reality check. I avoid pictures of myself, for this exact reason. I hate looking at what I've allowed myself to become. I look at this and I feel overwhelmed. Like I'm so far gone there's no point in even trying to do anything about it. I look at this photo and it buries the hope, the positive thinking, the desire to try. It buries it all under 540 pounds of reality.
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| where's the chair? |
2 comments:
Is surgery an option for you? Statistically it is the best option, by far.
Don't give up.
You CAN do it! Is that you now or an old picture? It is a long way and I can't imagine if I would have the strength to do it or not, but I do know that it CAN be done. Have you thought about trying out for the Biggest Loser? That would give you the start you need. Personal trainers, Personal diet plan, Dr consultations etc...Im sure you have seen the show. You can NOT give up and let go. I know you have people that care about you cause after just this short time and tiny bit of contact, I care about you. Yes it is a long long hard road, but that road exists and is just needs you to keep walking it cause I know you have already started! You made a comment "where's the chair"...You may see that as truth but don't look at yourself that way. See the truth, see how bad it has gotten and how dangerous it is but SEE THAT YOU MATTER. SEE YOU. The you inside. Don't turn a blind eye to the truth or the part you played in getting there, but don't hate yourself for it. Forgive yourself and promise yourself that you WILL change it no matter what it takes! You matter. You are worth it.
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