My Hyde side (or the inner me that won't)

I have inside me a couple voices. They live in my head. The other me and his compadre I can't. Vocal little bastards they are.

"If you could give the person who is
responsible for most of you troubles a kick in the caboose, you
wouldn't be able to sit down for a month."

Damn, how true is that?

It's "I choose ..." When your
subconscious mind hears your priorities stated in a
forceful, positive manner, it feels your power. It then
uses that power to mobilize your inner resources
toward achieving your priorities. In other words,
words count.

Something I just read called that inner voice Hyde (from the story). I thinks that's somewhat appropriate. I've often wondered if that bastard had a name. Most of my life I couldn't separate the voices. Now they are very distinct, separate and obnoxious.

I have the Hyde, he's an evil little bastard. He comes with a deep and dark hole that he tries time and again to shove me in. Hyde likes to keep me in the hole. Then there is the other long time voice. I know not what to name it. The lier perhaps? He's been with me most of my life. The one who says "don't worry, you're fine". He's the one that kept me from seeking help for so many years.

Between the two it's amazing I'm still alive. But now a third voice is coming out of hiding. A strange new voice. His name is Truth. Truth is trepidatious but not afraid. cautious but curious.  He's gotten his ass kicked into the corner most of my life. Lier and Hyde don't like him.

Hyde is the one who creates the fear. He's the pessimist to the extreme. The one who convinces me that their is no point. The one who has tried more than once to kill me. The one who creates the negative self image.

I speak of Hyde like he's a separate person but I know he's not. It's simply easier to write of that part of me in this way. I finally picked the lock on the cage Hyde locked me in many years ago. The door is open. Now I plot my escape. My path to freedom and the life I will have.